Here is what happened yesterday while we were in our "office" trying to clean & organize it...
T(Travis): "Why don't we put the sewing machine up in the attic?"
Me: "No, because I want to teach myself how to sew."
T: (Trying to find a place to put his textbooks) "Well, I'm going to put my textbooks on top of your bookshelf"(which is full of my cookbooks,fiction, binders, home improvement how-to books, and then there are christian books on the top shelf)
Me: "You can't put your textbooks on top of my books...I'm going to read all of those books. I won't have easy access to them."
T: "So, you are going to read all of those books, teach yourself how to sew, go through credentialing school and take care of Samuel??"
Me: "Yeah" (doesn't he know? I'm Wonder Woman)
That's typical me. I plan 5 bazillion things & I think I can accomplish it all. Furthermore, I don't want to get rid of anything because I think I may need it in the future.
Upon further reflection I now realize that I can probably get rid of those fiction books and make room for his textbooks. I just haven't been interested in reading fiction in a long time. It's just like watching TV...feels like a waste of time. Instead of living my own life I am watching someone live theirs. Don't get me wrong, I do watch TV, but I try not to.
Well, gonna go box those books up to take to a used book store. Won't he be surprised when he gets home?!!
Sunday, August 31, 2008
This Week (and for the next couple years)
Did I mention that I start the teacher credentialing program this week? I'm actually excited now. The truth is, I am at my best when I have a stricter schedule that I must follow. Dishes will probably get done quicker. Vacuuming will happen more often. My time with Sammy will be more focused on him. I was at an orientation for the program a couple Saturdays ago and when I called home to check on Sammy, I could hear his little squeals in the background. Normally, I take those noises for granted, but those noises were so precious to me in that moment and made my heart want to be there with him. I think I take him for granted sometimes. I've been at home with him everyday, all day. He's such a blessing in my life and I don't ever want to take him for granted.
I give him kisses all the time and usually he's somewhat passive as I smother his cheeks with kisses. The other night,I went to give him kisses and he leaned his cheek in and then he finally gave me a kiss back (nice slobbery wet kiss on my cheek). Awwwww.
I give him kisses all the time and usually he's somewhat passive as I smother his cheeks with kisses. The other night,I went to give him kisses and he leaned his cheek in and then he finally gave me a kiss back (nice slobbery wet kiss on my cheek). Awwwww.
I'm Sicky
I haven't been feeling well this morning; I'm staying home from church (and for a different reason than what the story below would suggest). The good news is that I have finally been sticking with Weight Watchers. I'm seeing results and feeling very motivated. Even though I wanted to lose weight, I just wasn't that motivated the first year of Sammy's life.
Now, I want all my friends out there to not make the same mistakes I have made. I have this problem, I don't always follow directions. For example, a couple nights ago I was making salsa. The directions recommended that while chopping jalepenos the use of gloves will prevent irritation. Being a foolish girl, I thought, "Well, I don't need gloves! That won't happen to me!" Trust me, gloves should be worn while cutting jalepenos. My hands started to burn and there were blotches of red all over them. My husband suggested that I should soak my hands in a bowl of water & baking soda. That did not work. I went online to research how to stop the burning. A site recommended that I soak my hands in milk. While my hands were soaking there was some relief, but it did not last. I had to go to bed with hands that felt as though they had been burned by the sun. Yesterday, there were still spots on my hands that hurt but I'm almost back to normal today. So, heed my warning: Follow directions!!!!
Now, I want all my friends out there to not make the same mistakes I have made. I have this problem, I don't always follow directions. For example, a couple nights ago I was making salsa. The directions recommended that while chopping jalepenos the use of gloves will prevent irritation. Being a foolish girl, I thought, "Well, I don't need gloves! That won't happen to me!" Trust me, gloves should be worn while cutting jalepenos. My hands started to burn and there were blotches of red all over them. My husband suggested that I should soak my hands in a bowl of water & baking soda. That did not work. I went online to research how to stop the burning. A site recommended that I soak my hands in milk. While my hands were soaking there was some relief, but it did not last. I had to go to bed with hands that felt as though they had been burned by the sun. Yesterday, there were still spots on my hands that hurt but I'm almost back to normal today. So, heed my warning: Follow directions!!!!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Update
Okay, so I never did post regarding that picture of Sam at the beach. We went to Dillon's Beach, in the Bay Area, as a family. This beach has sentimental meaning to us because Travis took me there on one of our first dates. The first time we went it was beautiful. This time, not so much. It was very foggy, a tad cold and too windy. Sammy cried and whined for most of the way there and back. On the way back I finally resorted to distracting him with food. I sat in the back and gave Sam food to keep him quiet, while Travis drove. Wow, I'm not sure if I have just set him up for a life of obesity or what.Next time I will be better prepared.
The day before the beach trip I dragged Travis and Sammy to the California State Fair. It was First Responders Day so Travis got in free and we parked about a half mile outside the park in order to save eight bucks. We walked around and looked at the exhibits mostly. I think it was just nice to do something together as a family (other than watch TV, go to the park, or go out to eat). We actually did end up going to TGI Fridays afterwards.
I start my teacher credentialing program next week. I'm actually kinda excited about it. Though my grades may not reflect it, I really do like school. I enjoy learning, taking on a challenge, setting goals and reaching them. I must admit, I am sick of cooking and cleaning. I'm not going to stop these tasks just because I am in school but it will be nice to feel like I have a purpose. I know, I know, I have a great purpose and it's takng care of Sammy and Travis. I love that I get to be a wife and mom but sometimes the daily tasks of maintaining a household get monotonous.
The day before the beach trip I dragged Travis and Sammy to the California State Fair. It was First Responders Day so Travis got in free and we parked about a half mile outside the park in order to save eight bucks. We walked around and looked at the exhibits mostly. I think it was just nice to do something together as a family (other than watch TV, go to the park, or go out to eat). We actually did end up going to TGI Fridays afterwards.
I start my teacher credentialing program next week. I'm actually kinda excited about it. Though my grades may not reflect it, I really do like school. I enjoy learning, taking on a challenge, setting goals and reaching them. I must admit, I am sick of cooking and cleaning. I'm not going to stop these tasks just because I am in school but it will be nice to feel like I have a purpose. I know, I know, I have a great purpose and it's takng care of Sammy and Travis. I love that I get to be a wife and mom but sometimes the daily tasks of maintaining a household get monotonous.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
A Personal Moment
I don't even know how to begin this post. A part of me thinks this is too personal to share on a public blog and another part of me doesn't care. I feel alone in this problem.I feel like there are few who understand. Or, at least, amongst those who I actually know there are few who deal with this issue (that I know of). I talk to God all the time about this issue. I wonder if I am being punished, but then I think that this is faulty thinking. Or, is it? I try to remind myself that God's plan is bigger and better than my own. God's thoughts are not my thoughts and His ways are not my ways. He knows what is best for me and that helps with me patience. I try not to think about it too much because I don't want to be discontent in my daily life. I want to enjoy the blessings I have now and not allow the blessings that I do not have to make me ungrateful or to taint the good things in my life.
You see, since Samuel was born (14 months ago) we have been trying for another child. Children are blessings and I wonder why He has been withholding another blessing from us? To refine us? To make our faith greater? To make us content with what we have? Because He only wants us to have one child? I don't know. We don't have extra money nor great medical insurance to be able to see a fertility doctor. I've had basic medical exams (i.e. blood tests) and everything has come back normal. I know I need to focus on the great blessings I have in my life. And, God has spared me from the agony of miscarriage and/or having a stillborn child.It could be a lot worse, I know. Yet, I struggle.
Even as a little girl I hoped I would have a big family. I use to tell people that I wanted eight children. In fact, sometimes I think I should not be watching "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" because I start to feel discontent about my own life. Logically, I think eight children would be too much for us to handle. I always say "four or five" and Travis says "two or three". So, I think a good compromise would be four (har har har). Nevertheless, I hope for many children (whether that be 3, 4 or 5).The thought of never having another child frightens me.I try not to think about it actually and hope and pray God has more children planned for us.
The irony is that I may get pregnant within the next 6 months and I'll think, "Why was I worried? I just needed to wait on God's timing!I should trust Him more." For years I agonized about when I would get married. When I reached age 25 and was still unmarried,I thought,"Am I ever going to get married?? Why is God withholding this blessing from me? This stinks, I'm going to be single for the rest of my life!!!" And then, a couple months later, I met Travis and we both instantly knew that we were meant to be together. We were married within 6 months.And, of course, now I think,"What was I so worried about?! I should have enjoyed my singless more. I should have traveled more. I should have spent more time being thankful for my singleness than being discontent! I should have taken advantage of that time and not worried about 'this guy' or 'that guy'." I should be using the lesson learned from that and apply it to my current situation, but I still struggle.
I guess I am sharing this on my blog as a way of working through this issue in my life. Also, maybe others will pray for me.
Some days are better than others.Some moments I think, "I should just focus on my family and losing weight. I should focus on being a better wife and mother." Yet, my heart still cries out for another precious baby.:(
You see, since Samuel was born (14 months ago) we have been trying for another child. Children are blessings and I wonder why He has been withholding another blessing from us? To refine us? To make our faith greater? To make us content with what we have? Because He only wants us to have one child? I don't know. We don't have extra money nor great medical insurance to be able to see a fertility doctor. I've had basic medical exams (i.e. blood tests) and everything has come back normal. I know I need to focus on the great blessings I have in my life. And, God has spared me from the agony of miscarriage and/or having a stillborn child.It could be a lot worse, I know. Yet, I struggle.
Even as a little girl I hoped I would have a big family. I use to tell people that I wanted eight children. In fact, sometimes I think I should not be watching "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" because I start to feel discontent about my own life. Logically, I think eight children would be too much for us to handle. I always say "four or five" and Travis says "two or three". So, I think a good compromise would be four (har har har). Nevertheless, I hope for many children (whether that be 3, 4 or 5).The thought of never having another child frightens me.I try not to think about it actually and hope and pray God has more children planned for us.
The irony is that I may get pregnant within the next 6 months and I'll think, "Why was I worried? I just needed to wait on God's timing!I should trust Him more." For years I agonized about when I would get married. When I reached age 25 and was still unmarried,I thought,"Am I ever going to get married?? Why is God withholding this blessing from me? This stinks, I'm going to be single for the rest of my life!!!" And then, a couple months later, I met Travis and we both instantly knew that we were meant to be together. We were married within 6 months.And, of course, now I think,"What was I so worried about?! I should have enjoyed my singless more. I should have traveled more. I should have spent more time being thankful for my singleness than being discontent! I should have taken advantage of that time and not worried about 'this guy' or 'that guy'." I should be using the lesson learned from that and apply it to my current situation, but I still struggle.
I guess I am sharing this on my blog as a way of working through this issue in my life. Also, maybe others will pray for me.
Some days are better than others.Some moments I think, "I should just focus on my family and losing weight. I should focus on being a better wife and mother." Yet, my heart still cries out for another precious baby.:(
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